The Power of Rewording "No"

The other day, I emailed a student about her schedule for state testing.

The truth is: no one likes state testing. But, everyone in school has to do it. Failure to do so can land us all in hot water. So, our school stresses attendance. It is very verY VERY important that our students attend the state testing.

Now, one thing you want to remember as an Independent Studies teacher is that there is more than one way to communicate with your student and that you need to communicate events more than once. There's email, phone, google voice, google voice text, batman signal...You get the gist. You do this to CYA and because students forget stuff all the time. Brains suck sometimes and we've all been there when we forget something very important.

So, I had a student with whom I communicated via email who stated that she was going to be late to one of her state tests. I told her: "no" and "you will need to reschedule with your previous engagement and let them know you have to take this test."


Boy, did I feel like a jerk after that email. She's a good student and she tries very hard to balance her schoolwork with her personal life.

What I should have done was reworded my "No" to her. I could have asked: "Is there any way you can reschedule with your other engagement?" and "Can you tell them that this test is really important for graduating?" By asking her, I put the responsibility back into her hands. Now, not only does she understand I care about her future by saying this test is necessary to graduate, I also show her that she should care about her future. 

Always frame your interactions in a positive light. Some of your students have heard no all their lives. You can change their responses to you and to others by being positive. It's time they take accountability and responsibility for their future while you guide them along their way.

What are some positive phrases and interactions you have used with your students?

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